


I Won't Say I Told You So

by HuntersMoon47



Series: Wait For Me To Come Home [10]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fix-It, Fluff and Smut, Mass Effect 3, N7 (Mass Effect), N7 Day, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2020-02-03
Packaged: 2020-08-11 00:08:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20144266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HuntersMoon47/pseuds/HuntersMoon47
Summary: She'd been telling them for years now, but they never listened.





	1. Danica

**Author's Note:**

> Yes! I am finally, finally, getting this up and going again. 
> 
> Life is suuuuper busy for me right now and I have barely any time to write, but I'm trying. The good news is, I've got a few chapters of this pre-written so I can try to keep ahead of things. 
> 
> I'm also going back and editing the other parts of the series - nothing too major is planned, but some typos, grammar issues, and "tightening" the story up a bit. If there are any major changes, I'll post a link to the chapter in whichever new chapter I post next so ya'll can keep up with them if you want.

She honestly thought she’d have gone insane by now. Danica Shepard hadn’t been on Earth for so long since she was a kid. If you could call being confined to Headquarters being back. She hadn’t seen anything but the base. Even that was limited, though mostly by her own choice. The whispers and stares got really old, really fast.

“Commander.” A deep, booming voice interrupted her thoughts. Danica turned away from the window she’d been staring out of. Lieutenant James Vega was standing in her doorway, dressed in his usual fatigues and two-sizes too small t-shirt that showed off arms the size of her thighs. His hand brushed his forehead in salute.

“You’re not supposed to call me that anymore, James.”

“Not supposed to salute you anymore either,” he snarked back. Usually, there was a grin to accompany his sass. Today there was none. That didn’t bode well. He dropped his hand and nodded toward the hallway. “We gotta go. The defense committee wants to see you.”

“Sounds important.” She dropped the datapad she’d been ignoring onto the coffee table and followed the soldier out into the hallway. 

People were moving quickly in the corridor. Too quickly. There were too many eyebrows pulled tight. Too many hushed conversations and hurried steps. Danica jogged until she was walking side-by-side with the mound of muscle that had become her friend. Vega was a bit naive and muscle-headed for her usual taste in people but he’d proven to be good company while she had been detained. It was easy to spot the hero-worship he held for her, despite the allegations being tossed around about her mental state, but they’d settled down into an easy going relationship pretty quickly. Which, if she were honest, was probably one of the only reasons she hadn’t lost it yet. Between their sparring sessions and late nights playing video games, there were times she almost forgot she was a prisoner for saving the entire fucking galaxy.

The committee had given him the title of “assistant” but they all knew he was her babysitter. As if some kid could actually keep her grounded if she wanted to leave. Deadline. She hoped they got off their asses before she hit the nine month mark, or she was going to feel guilty about the permanent mark she’d have to leave on his record. She’d told Hackett she’d play the game, so she had. For six months now. At the rate they were moving, they weren’t going to make her 

“What’s going on?” she asked him. Someone hurried past her, bumping into her shoulder. Something was definitely wrong. No one paused to stare at her - Hero of the Skillian Blitz, Savior of the Citadel, Destroyer of the Aratoth System. No one paid her any attention now. They were all focused on something else. 

“Couldn’t say,” James responded. “Just told me they needed you. Now.”

Dread settled in Danica’s stomach. There were only a few things that they defense committee would need her for with that type of urgency and none of them were good. The dread grew when she saw Anderson approaching in his dress blues. 

He had been Hackett’s plan; his bulldog for her defense. She may be grounded, but Hackett had put Anderson in charge of her case. He’d defended her; stood by her while the defense committee listened to the audio recording of the mission in Aratoth; made sure they listened to every minute so that there was no question as to her motives. He’d made sure they believed her - finally fucking believed her - about the Reapers. He’d made sure they started making preparations. 

“Anderson,” she said. It had been two months since she’d seen him last. He’d been called to the Citadel for some political business. The fact that he was still dressed for political business meant he’d come straight from the Citadel. “This can’t be good.”

“Admiral.” James saluted formally while Danica just stretched out her arm for a handshake. Even if she was no longer active duty, the time when she saluted Anderson had long passed. They were friends first, officers second. Anderson didn’t care and if anyone else did they could kiss her ass. Frankly, she was over military protocol.

“You look good, Shepard,” he smiled as he shook his hand and she fell into step with him. James respectfully followed behind. Anderson winked and patted her stomach. “Maybe a little soft around the edges.”

Danica snorted. Like hell, she was soft around the edges. With no ship or crew to run, she’d had time to get into the best shape of her life. She’d be ready for this war, even if no one else was.

“How are you holding up since being relieved of duty?” He asked. Indignation rolled through her, as it always did when she thought of the committee’s decision. It had been a political move - they’d at least been honest about that - made just before Anderson got called to the Citadel. But if she wanted them to focus on preparing for the Reapers, they couldn’t be distracted by staving off a war with the Batarians for the losses in Aratoth. It had been one of the hardest things she’d ever done, swallowing her pride and accepting the compromise. 

“Oh you know, it’s not so bad once you get used to the hot food and soft beds,’ she said. Anderson laughed. They both knew she was being sarcastic. She hated it; hated every meal with hot food and every night with a soft bed because they were only reminders of where she was and where she’d rather be. 

“We’ll get it sorted out, Danica,” he said as they approached the stairs to the committee chambers. The activity here was even more hurried, more frantic. 

“What’s going on?” She asked him. “Why is everyone in such a hurry.”

“Admiral Hackett is mobilizing the fleet,” Anderson answer, stealing a sideways glance at her. “I’m guessing word has made it to Alliance Command. Something big is headed our way.”

Danica stopped in her tracks at the bottom of the stairs, her gut twisting and turning, as Anderson continued. 

“The Reapers?” she asked, her voice too soft. Anderson paused a few steps up and turned to look at her.

“We don’t know. Not for certain,” he said but she could see the fear in his eyes. 

“What else could it be?” She demanded. She knew Anderson; knew he wanted concrete evidence before he said something was or was not. But she no longer had the patience to participate in the song and dance. 

“If I knew that…” he started but Danica just shook her head. 

“You know we’re not ready. Not by a long shot,” she said. Anderson shook his head.

“Tell that to the defense committee.” He started up the stairs again and this time Danica followed him. It wouldn’t matter if she told the defense committee. Despite them finally being willing to listen, they still could not grasp the concept of the Reapers. It was too far outside what any of them had known. She’d tried to explain to them what was coming but characterizing the Reapers to people who had never seen them was next to impossible. 

“Unless we’re planning to talk the Reapers to death, the committee is a waste of time.” Which she had been telling him in her communications for weeks. He kept telling her to be patient. She kept telling him they didn’t have time to be patient. And around and around they had gone. Until now. 

“They’re just scared,” he said for the thousandth time. “None of them have seen what you’ve seen. You’ve faced down a Reaper. Hell you spoke to one, then blew the damn thing up! You’ve seen how they harvest us, what they plan to do to us. You know more about this enemy than anyone.”

“That why the grounded me? Took away my ship.” The words escaped her before she could stop them. She knew it wasn’t his fault. 

Anderson stopped, turned toward her and sighed with exasperation. They’d been over this a thousand times as well.

“You know that's not true.“ He spoke to her with his hand raised, finger pointed at her. Like a damned father. Not that she’d really know what that was like. The man in front of her was as close to a father as she’d ever had. “When you blew up the Batarian relay, hundreds of thousands of Batarian died!”

She knew it. Knew it far more than anyone else. She’d made the fucking call. She lived with the guilt. And she knew Anderson was right, but her damn pride wouldn’t just let her relent; wouldn’t accept the irritated scowl on Anderson’s face. 

“It was that or let the Reapers walk through our back door.” She argued. Next to them, Vega shifted his weight uncomfortably. 

“Damnit, Shepard, I know that!” Anderson closed his eyes and took a deep breath, clearly calming himself. “And so does the Committee. If it wasn’t for that, you’d have been court-martialed and left to rot in the brig!”

She pressed her lips together and glanced at Vega again. Poor kid got so uncomfortable when the two of them argued. Danica let out a long breath to cool her temper. It had been worse lately; a lot worse. Being grounded; couped up in a small apartment; a babysitter following her around; no word from her crew in six months; no word from Garrus.

“That and your good word,” she relented. Anderson relaxed visibly. 

“Yeah,” he said. “I trust you. And so does the committee.”

“I’m just a soldier, Anderson. I’m no politician. I don’t want to play their games. I want to fight.”

“I know,” he sighed. “I’m working on it. But right now, I don’t need you to be either. I just need you to whatever the hell it takes to help us stop the Reapers.”

He started toward the committee room again and once again, she fell into step beside him. At least now he was admitting whatever was coming was probably the Reapers. The receptionist in the lobby nodded to Anderson and Shepard when they walked in. She was one of the few here that ever bothered to acknowledge her anymore.

“They’re expecting you, Admiral. Commander.” She always called her Commander and Danica loved her for it. 

They followed her down the long hallway, past offices and meeting rooms, Danica’s heart pounding in her chest with every footstep. When the reached the reception area, Vega stuck out his hand. 

“Good luck in there, Shepard,” he said. Danica accepted the handshake with a smile. 

“After the last year or so, I’m pretty sure my luck ran out the day Cerberus brought me back from the dead,” she said with a wink. And then a voice floated across the room that made her gut clench. She grimaced. “Exhibit A.”

She turned to see Kaiden Alenko standing in front of Anderson on the other side of the room. His eyes shifted slowly over to her. 

“Shepard,” he said and damn her if that voice still didn’t cut through her gut like a knife. Danica clenched her jaw. Heaving a sigh, she started over to them. 

“Kaiden,” she responded as she paused next to Anderson. 

“How did it go in there, Major.” the Admiral asked. Major. Well, that was new. Kaiden looked from Anderson to her and then back again. 

“Okay, I think,” he said. Then sighed. “Hard to know. I’m just waiting for orders now.”

Of course, he was. Good little soldier boy, always waiting for orders. Danica tried to stomp down on her irritation. Despite his less than stellar attempt at an apology email while she’d still been with Cerberus, she was still pissed as hell at him for Horizon. She wondered what he thought about her blowing up the Batarian relay.

Thankfully, the assistant saved Danica from any smart ass remark she would have made by approaching them once again. Addressing Anderson, she started toward the door to the chambers. Anderson nodded his head after her. 

“Come on,” he said. Kaiden’s eyes stayed on her as Danica passed, following the Admiral. He even had the nerve to offer her a small nod. Maybe if she wasn’t positive the Reapers were headed here now and it hadn’t been six months since she’d had sex, she wouldn’t be so tense; maybe she wouldn't want to punch him in that annoying, perfect schoolboy face of his. As it were, she barely had the self-control to pass without saying a word. She could feel his eyes on her as she followed Anderson. 

“You knew the Commander?” 

Danica picked up James’ question with her augmented hearing. She could even hear Kaiden sigh in response. 

“I used to,” he said, sounding sad. Danica snorted. He wasn’t wrong about that. 


	2. Danica

Any thoughts of Kaiden fled as soon as she entered the committee room. She’d spent almost as much time in here over the last six months as she had her cell - her apartment - and had never seen it in such a state. 

Aides and security hurried around the room. In front of the backdrop of the skyline of Vancouver, the committee spoke in hushed whispers. When they saw the two of them enter, several of the lower officers saluted Anderson. Most of them were too busy to notice the entrance. There was palpable tension here. Something was very wrong.

“Admiral Anderson. Shepard.” The ranking committee member, Simpson, greeted them as the others took their seats. She and Anderson stopped in the middle of the floor before their bench. Danica could feel it - the fear in the room; the uncertainty. 

“What’s the situation?” She demanded, not caring that she was inactive and lower in rank than fifty percent of the people in this room. If the Reapers were here, this was her show, whether they wanted it to be or not. There was no time for politics or formalities. 

Simpson didn’t hesitate to address her directly. At least that was one less fight she had to have today, as it was looking that it was going to be a doozy.

“We...were hoping you could us,” Simpson answered, his voice tight. 

That was a bad sign. A very bad sign.

Danica accepted the datapad some officer she didn’t recognize offered her as another member spoke. She was newer - Jessup, Danica thought her name was. 

“The reports are…” Jessup paused. “Unlike anything we’ve seen.”

“Yeah, well, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you guys,” Danica mumbled under her breath as she scanned the information on the datapad. Anderson elbowed her in the ribs. 

“Shepard,” he whispered in warning as Jessup continued. 

“Whole colonies have gone dark. We’ve lost contact with everyone beyond the Sol Relay.”

Dread rolled over Danica. Everything outside this system. That meant they were close. Very, very close. 

“Whatever this is,” Simpson said. “It’s incomprehensibly powerful.”

“Shepard,” Anderson whispered again, anticipating her anger. Danica looked up at the committee, all patience and pretense gone. 

“You brought me here to confirm what you already know.” She said. “The Reapers are here.”

The room went entirely still. Everyone in the room stopped and stared at her as though she hadn’t been telling them for months - fuck, for years - that this day was coming. 

“Then, how do we stop them?” Jessup asked. Danica gaped at the woman. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She asked. 

“Shepard!” Anderson whispered loud enough for the entire room to hear in the echoing silence. She ignored them. 

“Stop them? This isn’t about strategy or tactics. This is about survival.” She strode toward the bench. “The Reapers are more advanced than we are. More powerful. More intelligent. They don’t fear us. And they will never take pity on us.”

“But, there must be some way,” Jessup argued, denial in her eyes. Danica ground her teeth together. She wanted to tell them that maybe there had been a way three years ago, when they first one showed up and indoctrinated Saren. Or maybe a year ago, when she’d woken up from the dead and tried to get them to help her stop them. Even maybe six months ago when they’d locked her up and taken her ship for preventing the invasion of the Milky Way single-handedly. 

But then she saw the lower officers in the room; saw the fear in their eyes; and for the first time, in what felt like ages, trust. In her. Despite being relieved of duty, she was still Commander Shepard. They knew who she was. What she’d done. What she was capable of. And God save her, if felt good to be looked at like that again. So she took a deep breath and offered them the only thing she could. A sliver of hope. 

“If we’re going to have any chance at surviving this, we have to stand together,” she said, keeping her eyes on the officers on the floor. One of the committee members snorted. 

“That’s it?” He demanded. “That’s our plan?”

Before Danica could respond, an officer at the communication station spoke. She was looking at Anderson, not the committee. 

“Admiral, we’ve lost contact with Luna Base.”

They were here. 

Danica wanted to be sick. 

They were here and they weren’t ready. 

“The moon?” Anderson looked at her, eyes wide. “They couldn’t be that close already.”

But they both knew they could. And they were.

“How’d they get past our defenses?” Jessup muttered out loud. Again, Danica was saved from making an untimely snarky response by the communications officer. 

“Sir, the UK office has a visual.”

A screen above the young woman flickered on. All eyes in the room fixed on it. Except for Anderson and Danica, who held each other’s gaze for a few more seconds. For a moment it was just snow on the screen. And then a UK officer appeared on the screen. 

He was calling May Day, chaos all around him. Fires burning. Smoke billowing. 

War. 

It was here. 

Then there was an ear-shattering sound. One that shook Danica to her very core. It was low and deep and terrifying. It was a sound that had haunted her dreams for months now.

And then the signal cut out. 

Everyone was on their feet, eyes wide, mouths gaping at the screen. Tension grew in the room until it was so thick she could barely breathe. The communications officer worked frantically at the controls and another image appeared on the screen. 

“Oh fuck,” Danica whispered. In the center of the image, next to the Tower Bridge in London, was a Reaper. More images began to pop up. Major cities around the world, satellite images, space stations. Reapers in every picture.

“Why haven’t we heard from Hackett?” Anderson looked at Danica. She shook her head. God, if that man was dead, they really had no hope. 

“What do we do?” Simpson asked, his gaze falling heavily on Danica. She’d known this day was coming; had known that it would fall to her and the few that had listened to her over the years; knew that this was just the beginning. But still, the weight of that gaze was enough to almost make her knees buckle. 

She looked at Anderson again, who gave her the slightest of nods. Then she took a deep breath and approached the Bench once again. 

“The only thing we can,” she said, pointing back to the screen that held the image of her enemy. “We fight, or we die.” 

And still, the committee seemed to hesitate. Frustration boiled in her chest. Then Anderson was at her side. 

“We should get to the Normandy,” he said. But before she could respond, a low rumble began to shake the room. People looked around, searching for the source, but Danica didn’t have to look. 

she knew. Her eyes flew to the window behind the committee. The members followed her gaze, a few of them getting out of their chairs and approaching the glass. 

A red light flickered in the grey clouds as Jessup whispered. 

“Oh my God.” 

Only the bottom of the claws of the ship were visible when it started firing. Moments later a high pitched ring echoed through the room. She glanced at Anderson and then back to the window to see a sliver of red light outside the glass. 

“Move!” She shouted as the red beam grew larger. “Go! Go!”

Officers scrambled around her. The committee members dove for cover. But it was too late. 

The window exploded into fire. The force of the explosion throwing Danica back. 

Her head hit the ground and everything went dark.


	3. Danica

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Earth is burning
> 
> Like I said in the notes for Chapter 1, I'm going through and editing the story from the beginning. Mostly just grammatical errors and sentence strucutre. But if you want to start Dani & Garrus' story from the beginning, check it out. "Horizon" is now edited. https://archiveofourown.org/works/9864362/chapters/22134305#workskin

Earth was burning. Her people were dying. The fate she’d been dreading for years was upon her and it almost felt like a dream. The kid - the little boy she’d watching playing with his spaceship in a garden from her window earlier that day - almost had her convinced. Seeing him the duct and then him disappearing; it felt so real and yet unreal at the same time. 

_ You can’t help me. _

But she didn’t have time to dwell on it. The Reapers were here. 

It had been years since she’d been on the battlefield with Anderson but they fell into an old, familiar rhythm. They fought their way through husks and the nausea that she felt whenever she saw them, settled in her stomach. 

Husks and Reapers on Earth. It had been her worst nightmare for more than three years and it was happening. 

Without armor she was cut and bruised more than usual. With only a pistol she was a fraction of her typical self on the battlefield. It was frustrating. Angering, when she allowed herself to think that some of this destruction could have been avoided if people had only listened when she first made contact with the Reapers; that some of this blood wouldn’t be spilled if only things had been different. 

She never thought she’d be happy to hear Kaiden Alenko’s voice again until the Normandy flew over their heads. What a difference thirty minutes could make.

“The cavalry has arrived,” his voice came over their comms. Anderson snorted. Danica had forgotten how snarky he could on the battlefield. She hadn’t even realized that he was probably who she learned it from. 

“About time,” he snapped. Danica never took her eyes off the Normandy, once again carrying the Alliance insignia. It was one of the most beautiful sights she’d ever seen. At least something in this universe was as it should be today.

“Let’s go,” she said and took off at a run. Anderson followed as she leaped over debris and started planning. Get to the Normandy. Get to the Citadel and get help. Get Garrus. And then figure out how the fuck to beat these assholes. 

Whoever was flying was good, flipping the ship and opening the ramp to the shuttle bay just as she was arriving. She prayed it was Joker. Vega and Kaiden stood side-by-side, guns in hand, ready to provide cover. Danica leaped for her ship, Kaiden catching her when she stumbled a bit. 

“Welcome back, Shepard,” he said. Danica ignored him and turned to look back to make sure Anderson could make the jump. He was still good with a gun, but it was a big leap and he wasn’t as young as he once was. He was standing on the edge of the downed bridge she’d just jumped from. 

“Shepard!” He shouted. 

“Come on!” She yelled back. They didn’t have time to waste. A shuttle swooped in behind him. Anderson looked at it and then back to her, jaw set, determination in his eyes. Damnit. Damnit. Damnit. She knew that man. She knew that look. Danica’s stomach dropped. 

“I’m not going,” he called. Danica shook her head, her heart in her throat. He pointed behind him. “You saw those men back there. There’s a million more like them and they need a leader.”

“There are other leaders. We’re in this fight together, Anderson,” Danica argued. “If you stay, I stay.”

She could hear the desperation in her own voice. If he stayed here... His expression softened just a bit; just enough for someone who had known him for fifteen years to notice and appreciate. She knew he did it for her - let his inner self show just a little for her to see - and that made the pain even worse.

“It’s a fight we can’t win, Dani. Not without help. We need every species and all their ships to even have a chance at defeating the Reapers.” He smiled at her sadly. “Talk to the Council. Convince them to help us. You’re the only person that can.”

Danica shook her head again. She couldn’t leave him here. She needed him. He’d had her back longer than anyone in her life; always there when she needed support, advice, someone to cover her ass. 

“What if they won’t listen?” She asked, feeling like she was eighteen again, asking what would happen if the Alliance wouldn’t let her be a Marine. Desperate. Unsure. Scared as all hell. He smiled confidently, just like he had then; like he knew some secret; knew she’d be just fine even if she didn’t feel like she would.

“Then you make them listen. You’ll find a way. You always do,” he said. There was a moment when they looked at one another, both knowing this was probably goodbye, but neither willing to say it. And then his face hardened and he was back to being the Admiral again. “Now go! That’s an order!”

“I don’t take orders from you anymore. Remember?” She said in one last attempt to ignore his wishes; in one last smart ass comment.

And damn that infernal man, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of dog tags. Pulled them out of his pocket like they were always in there; like he carried them around with him for the inevitable day that she’d get them back. Because he believed her, believed in her, and he knew she’d need them back. Danica’s heart clenched in her chest as he tossed them to her casually, with that knowing smile, and her hands closed around the warm metal. 

“Consider yourself reinstated.” He said. “Commander.”

Danica looked down at the dog tags in her hand, her heart soaring. And then sinking again immediately when she looked back at her old mentor - her friend - standing below with Earth burning behind him. Like a hero taking his last stand. It broke her fucking heart.

“You know what you have to do, Dani.”

She felt tears burning in her eyes. 

“I’ll be back for you,” she shouted, her voice tight, as the Normandy’s engines grew louder. “And I’ll bring every fleet I can.”

She turned and started up the ramp, but took one last look over her shoulder. 

“Good luck,” she shouted. Anderson nodded at her, his face calm and determined. 

“You too,” he answered. 

And then she turned her back and walked into the ship. Kaiden met her eyes as the Normandy started to pull away. Despite everything, there was a certain comfort in having him there. He knew what Anderson was to her; knew how hard this was. Together they looked back at the Admiral. Danica had to stop a sob from escaping her as that old fool raised a hand in salute. And then took off at a run for the shuttle. 

Her heart nearly stopped when she saw the kid again. His blue eyes looking right up at her. The sounds around her faded as she met his gaze. Horror crept over her when he covered his ears and she saw the Reaper making it's way straight for him. The boy ran for the shuttle but no one was helping him. She couldn’t figure out why no one was helping him. When he finally managed to get on the shuttle again, he looked right at her as the door slid shut.

She gasped when the Reaper’s ray tore through two of the shuttles. Including one the boy had just climbed on.

“You okay, Shepard?” Kaiden asked at her side. Anger rolled over her. 

“No,” she snapped as she turned into the ship and stopped up the ramp as it closed. 


	4. Danica

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shep is back, Bitches.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy N7 Day, Nerds!

“What the hell’s going on?” Vega demanded as he followed her through the newly renovated shuttle bay noting that their lockers were right where they had been on the SR-1. It was a small relief to be on an Alliance regulation ship again, where the loadout area was in a place that made sense. She slipped her dog tags around her neck and tucked them under her shirt, the metal cool against her chest. “Where’s Anderson? Where are we going?”

“We’re leaving,” she said, not slowing her pace. 

“Leaving?” 

Kaiden fell into step beside her, nearly at a jog to keep pace. 

“What are we doing Shepard?” He asked. 

“Anderson wants us to go to the Citadel to get help for the fight,” she said, fighting the emotion still swirling in her chest at the thought of him down on the planet’s surface. She felt like she was going to throw up, thinking of him down there. 

“Bullshit!” Vega exclaimed. “He wouldn’t order us to leave!”

Shepard stopped in her tracks and turned on Vega, fury rolling through her. He’d never seen this side of her. He’d gotten the compliant Shepard who was playing games and jumping hoops to get the help she needed. But as of this moment, that Shepard was gone. All he had now was the tired as hell, hurting, furious Shepard. 

“We don’t have a choice,” Danica said stepping closer to the lieutenant. To his credit, Vega didn’t flinch when most would. “Without help, this war’s already over.”

“Forget it! Drop me off someplace, ‘cause I’m not leaving.” His challenging gaze didn’t waver. With a very Turian-like growl in her throat, Danica reached, grabbed the neck of his breastplate and pulled him down the almost ten inches it took for his shock-wide eyes to be level with hers. 

“Shepard,” Kaiden issued a warning from behind them. She ignored it. 

“That man pulled me out of the literal gutter when I was a kid and gave me a life. He trained me. He mentored me. He saved my life more times than I can count. He got me into the N7 program; gave me my first team; gave me my ship. That man that I left standing on a burning planet was the closest thing I ever had to a father. 

“You think I wouldn’t rather stay and fight? I would rather cut my heart out and serve it on a platter to the Reapers than let that man die. But do you want to know why I left him there, Lieutenant? Because we are at fucking war and there are bigger things at stake than what I want. 

“Now, I suggest you learn one lesson very quickly. This is my ship and on my ship, what I say goes. If I say we’re going to the fucking Citadel, that’s where we’re going, and I expect my crew to fall in line. You want out, you can catch a ride back from there. Got it, soldier?”

Vega swallowed hard. She could see the anger still simmering in his eyes and knew this wasn’t over, but he nodded anyway. 

“Yes, ma’am,” he rumbled. Danica let go of his armor. His jaw clenched, he turned and paced away before stopping and ramming his fist into the wall. Kaiden moved to stand next to her.

“Are we going to have a problem with rank, Alenko?” She asked. Before being raised from the dead by Cerberus she might have cared that he outranked her now; might have fallen in line and let him take the ship. But she meant what she’d said to Hackett on this ship six months ago - she was more than Alliance. And she was done playing games now. If she was going to save this galaxy, she was going to do it her fucking way, reinstated Alliance officer or no. 

To his credit, Kaiden didn’t so much as hesitate. 

“Your ship, your rules, Shepard,” he said quietly. “I would never presume otherwise, no matter how many stripes I have on my uniform.” 

Danica looked over at him to see his eyes on her. He still had the most beautiful brown eyes. She preferred ice blue over brown now, but It eased some of her residual animosity toward him. 

“Well, that’s one less battle I have to win at least,” she said. To her surprise, Kaiden chuckled as they started toward the elevator. 

“You presume you’d win?” He said. Danica snorted, heart still heavy but thankful for the distracting banter.

“We both know I’d win,” she said as she punched in a command to connect her coms to the ship. “Now, who the fuck is flying my ship?”

“Hello, Commander,” EDI’s soft, smooth voice was like medicine for the soul. Danica felt herself relax.    
  


“God, seriously, it is so great to hear you yelling again,” Joker broke the spell. “Do you have any idea how annoying it is to listen to these polite, tech types who have been poking around this ship for six months? I am not made for sitting at port making modifications, Shepard. I am made for kicking ass. Can we get started already?”

“Yes, Joker,” Danica said. “Yes, we can.”

“Good! Because you have an emergency transmission from Admiral Hackett.”

Danica sighed with relief. At least Hackett was alive. Even if she was still pissed as hell at him.

“Patch it through,” she said. Vega moved to rejoin her and Kaiden at the workstation near the elevator. Hackett’s image appeared on one of the screens. The feed was choppy; his words cutting in and out.

“Shepard...sustained heavy losses...force was overwhelming...There’s no way we can defeat them conventionally.”

“Anderson’s already ordered me to the Citadel, to talk to the Council.”

“First, I need you...ance outpost on Mars...ore we lose control of the system.”

Danica saluted out of habit. She kind of wished she hadn’t but supposed it was worthwhile for her crew to see her at least attempt to try to follow the rules. Especially after her rant to Vega seconds earlier.

“Yes, sir,” she replied respectfully.

“...been researching the Prothean Archives with Dr. T’Soni...found a way to stop the Reapers...only way to stop them...in contact soon. Hackett out.”

“Joker. Set a course for the Mars Archives.”

“Mars? Roger that.”

“This is loco,” Vega said. 

“Why Mars?” Kaiden asked. “What does he think we’ll find there?”

“I don’t know, yet.” Danica picked up one of the guns laying on the workbench and ran a hand over it. It must be a new model. “But if it helps win this war…Rule number 2, Lieutenant - I want a sidearm on you at all times while you’re on board. Keep it in your locker so you can put it on when you change out of your armor.” 

Danica said, shoving the pistol she’d picked up at his chest as she walked back toward their gear lockers. The two men fell into step behind her.

“Shepard, that is not protocol. The Alliance clearly prohibits carrying weapons while aboard fleet ships,” Kaiden protested. 

“First, we’re not a fleet ship. Special class, remember? Second, the Alliance didn’t have their ship boarded by Collectors and their entire crew taken without being able to fight back because no one carried. And the Alliance didn’t have to jump through the Omega 4 relay to the Collector homeworld to recover that crew.” Danica stopped when they reached the lockers and turned to face the Major and the Lieutenant. “All crew members will go through firearm training and certification while we’re on the Citadel and all crew will have a weapon on them at all times. You want to file a complaint with Alliance Command, be my guest.”

Kaiden sighed with resignation but nodded his consent. 

“This whole thing is fucking loco,” Vega muttered under his breath. Danica snorted. 

“It sure as hell is,” Danica muttered.


	5. Danica

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liara and her dramatic entrances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know. I'm moving sooooo slow. But, we're still here. I've got more. School is almost done and then, hopefully, I can post more than once every six months!

“Shepard, I need a straight answer,” Kaidan demanded as the door to the Archives slid behind them. Danica strode across the depressurization room.

“Kaidan…” she started, stopping at the control panel. She had no desire to go over this with him again. Neither one of them needed a re-do of Horizon; especially with Vega as an audience. 

“Don’t ‘Kaidan’ me!” He approached, pointing at her angrily and Danica resisted the urge to grab his finger and twist it. “This is business. Do you know anything about why Cerberus is here?”

“What makes you think I know what they’re after?” Danica fought to keep her temper under control. Apparently, they were going to do this. Here. Now. 

“You worked for them, for God’s sake. How am I not supposed to think that?” He moved to the railing and leaned on it heavily. Sometimes he was so god-damned dramatic. She couldn’t believe she was ever attracted to this. Danica suddenly missed Garrus so much, it was like a punch in the chest. Missed his honesty, his constant support, his undying belief in her. She had to take a deep breath to continue. 

“Christ, Kaidan, do we have to go over this again?” She couldn’t keep the fatigue out of her voice. “I used them to take down the Collectors. I didn’t fucking work for them.”

Kaidan pushed off the railing and paced in front of her. Hands waving as he spoke.

“There’s more to it! They rebuilt you from the ground up. They gave you a ship. Resources.” 

“Listen to me, Alenko.” Danica steeled her voice. This was going to be the last conversation she had with him about this or she was going to dump his ass on the Citadel. “There is nothing more to it. I used them. I didn’t have access to their networks, their information, nothing; just like they didn’t have access to mine. It was an alliance of necessity because no one else would fucking help. I haven’t had contact with Cerberus since the Omega 4 relay. I stole their ship, their crew, and their top officer. Do you really think they want to have anything to do with me? I have no idea why they’re here now, or what they want.”

“Commander Shepard’s been under constant surveillance since coming back to Earth,” Vega chimed in to support her. “There is no way they’ve communicated since.”

Kaidan snorted. 

“If you really think Danica Shepard went six months with no outside communication, you’re more naive than I thought,” he barked at Vega and Danica’s patience snapped. She wasn’t going to let Kaidan treat Vega like that; wasn’t going to let him take whatever emotions he had about her on an innocent bystander. She grabbed Kaidan’s armor and pulled him close, just like she had done to Vega earlier. 

“And you’re more of an asshole than I thought,” she growled. “Stop being a fucking dick, Alenko. Of course, I didn’t go six months without any communication but everything came through Hackett or Anderson. So unless you’re going to accuse them of being in bed with Cerberus too, then shut your fucking mouth about it already. We have more important things to worry about than your wounded sense of honor.”

Kaidan’s shoulders slumped. She could see the embarrassment in his eyes through his helmet.

“Sorry, Shepard,” he said quietly. “It’s just that…”

“I don’t want an explanation. I don’t care. You want to hate Cerberus, fine. But I’m done explaining myself to you.” She let go of his armor with a small push as the airlock pressurized. The three of them pulled their helmets off and Kaidan stepped back with his eyes down. “You of all people should know what I’m about. Others never forgot. I can’t quite figure out why you did.”

His eyes met hers, the regret so vivid it almost made her apologize. Almost. But she didn’t. Because regret or not, he’d made his choice about where he stood when it came to her. And it wasn’t beside her and it wasn’t behind her and he’d given no indication that was going to change any time soon.

The door to the loading bay slid open. Danica held Kaidan’s gaze steadily until he dropped his eyes and moved to take point. Vega approached her slowly and leaned his head close. 

“You were communicating the whole time?” He whispered. Danica kept her eyes on Kaidan’s back. 

“Sorry, James,” she said, pulling her rifle off her back. “It was nothing personal but I’ve been trying the whole save the galaxy. Being dark on Earth for six months didn’t fit well into that plan.”

Vega shrugged. 

“I’m more impressed than angry,” he admitted. “I’ve never seen two Admirals break regs so much for one soldier. They must really believe in you.”

Danica looked up at him. There was resolution in his expression. She knew he was still upset about leaving Earth, but her conversation with Kaidan had changed something in him. 

“Thanks, Vega.”

If he was going to say something, he didn’t get the chance. Gunshots and a loud clunking rang out from the loading bay. They both raised their weapons and hurried to join Kaidan just as Dr. Liara T’Soni fell from the ceiling. 

Danica waited until the Asari calmly and cooly took care of the two Cerberus agents who’d been pursuing her before stepping out of cover. 

“Oh Liara, you’re always making such a dramatic entrance,” she said, holstering her gun as she approached her friend. Liara’s eyes met hers. The Asari visibly relaxed and walked toward Shepard.

“Shepard,” she said with a small, sad smile. “It’s good to see you alive. When I heard about Earth…is it bad?”

Danica swallowed hard and nodded. 

“Worse than I imagined,” she said quietly. Liara gently squeezed her arm. She understood. They’d all been imagining what it would be like if the Reapers got to their planet. All of those who had been with her since the beginning. Danica cleared her throat and pushed the thoughts away. “Hackett said you found something?”

The clever, wicked grin that spread across Liara’s face made Danica smile too. She knew that look. Liara had a plan. And she loved it when Liara had a plan.

“I did,” Liara said. “Follow me.”


End file.
